As Time Goes By

September 22^nd, 2013

My dearest brother,

I am trying really hard to think back on what we did this week and I am drawing a giant blank. I guess instead of a recap of the whole week I will give you the highlights and how each of us is doing.

JAKE: Continually being amazing and supportive. He still works in Distribution for the church and is still going into Business (with an emphasis on IT) at Western Governors University. He has been trying to get in extra homework time lately so that he can finish his degree more quickly. He would like to finish in June of 2014… I’m not sure if it will happen but it would certainly be amazing if it could. That means that we would both be finished with school within 1 month of each other. He is still the Ward Mission Leader and has been communicating a lot with the missionaries and the Ward Council. We have a baptism in our ward in 2 weeks and he has been making arrangements for that to come together.

SHAYLA: I had a new student start piano this week. Her name is Rihtya (Rit-tee-a). She is from India and is my 3^rd Indian student. In fact, I was told by one of my piano moms that another one of her friends was interested in lessons. Before I know it all of my students will be Indian! I love it though because they are darling and dedicated girls who work very hard. I have been continually pressing through school and this semester is MAYBE 1/10 the difficulty of last semester. I have enjoyed the opportunity to just enjoy my schooling without so much push and stress.

ABRIELLE: We had an amazing occurrence happen with Abrielle this week. On Friday after I picked her up from preschool something set her off and she had a major meltdown. I kept warning her that if she couldn’t act like a yellow belt that she would have to miss karate but she persisted in her tirade. Finally I had to drag her, literally kicking and screaming, to the car. I told her that she had lost the privilege to go to karate and that we were going to go home. I buckled Nathan in and sat down to drive home just fuming that, once again, I was dealing with this behavior from her. I think that what frustrated me the most was that I felt that we had passed this stage. She has been doing so well and I hadn’t experienced one of these full blown meltdowns from her in a long time. It was very discouraging and disheartening.

As we were driving away from mom and dad’s house I heard her from the back seat saying, “It’s okay. It’s okay. You’re alright. Calm down. Just breathe. Calm down.” I was absolutely floored. It is hard for adults to calm themselves down in the midst of a full meltdown and here was my precious little 4-year-old taking the initiative to do what we were trying so hard to teach her. I almost burst into tears. She didn’t utter one more word of argument or start back up again. She sat quietly in her seat, softly sniffling, fully accepting of her fate in having to miss karate because of her behavior.

My heart was completely filled to the brim and I uttered a prayer of thanks and inquiry to the Lord. I wanted to follow through with my punishment but I felt that this was a great teaching opportunity for Abrielle. I knew that I could talk to her about the principle of repentance and second chances. I told her how much I love her and how grateful I was that she would calm down and stop arguing with me. I told her that because she did that that I would take her to karate. I also cautioned her that if she acted out again I would pull her out of karate and we would go home, but as long as she was respectful and acted like a yellow belt that she could stay.

It was a huge turning point in her life and in that day for her. She has been happy and respectful ever since that moment. I know that it won’t last forever but, for the time being, I am very grateful for this immense blessing and for the hope that the Lord has given me that things really can be different with her. We have worked so hard and so long for this.

She continues to love preschool and to perform well in karate. She operates the very best on positive encouragement and affirmation. She wants to be a good girl and works hard to be so.

NATHAN: We are dealing with much more frequent emergence of “the terrible twos” with Nathan. He continues to be sweet and loving but he has outbursts of emotions fairly regularly that we try to patiently work through. Bed time has become the biggest chore and we had one night this week that he screamed and kicked around for an hour before finally settling down. I am continually relying on the hand of the Lord to teach me what I need to do and who I need to be to best help my children find success in their lives. I am grateful for my beautiful children and, although these times are trying, I know that we can pull through them with the strength of the Lord.

CAR REGISTRATION: Miraculously, both cars passed their inspections this week. They are both registered and legal to drive for another year. Every year we reach this point is another miracle and blessing from the Lord. I don’t know how long these old cars will last but every extra day we have, I am grateful for.

TIME WITH FRIENDS: We were able to attend a barbecue with some of my friends from high school last night. It was a great opportunity to reconnect and to visit with them. They are all in a similar situation to us with school and kids. The food was great, the company was better, and I look forward to the next time we can get together.

I feel like there should be more to say but I am drawing a blank for now. I love you so much, dear brother, and I hope that you are well. I can’t believe there are only 87 days (12 letters from me) until you return home!!!! But… who is counting? J Finish strong and continue to work hard and be faithful.

All my love,

Shayla

My beautiful girl. Thanks to Alyssa Troff Murray for taking these fabulous pictures capturing her personality so well! This girl brings me great delight.